Trish's story

I am 45 years old and had never been bullied and had a successful career with long term jobs.  I started a temp job and after 2 days temping I was asked to extend my stay for the rest of the week. I informed them I had interviews and could not stay the whole week. I was then called in by the top man who offered me a full time supervisory position as he was so impressed with my skills and I got on well with the team. I accepted his offer but said I needed to learn his in house computer system etc. he assured me I would have full training.  I left the agency, cancelled interviews and was taken on directly by them.

On my 2nd week an elderly lady quizzed me about my position and her attitude towards me seemed hostile, she said she was the supervisor etc.  By the end of that day she was reluctant to assist in anything, humiliated me in front of everyone by calling me stupid, saying I was talking rubbish, insulting me and ridiculing me in front of the 'team' who found her behaviour hilarious.  She said  I could only ask questions by Skyping her and the rest of the team (which included her daughter).  She even insulted me in front of customers.  I decided to confront her alone about this the next day and suggested we both talk to the top man.  She was reluctant to do this and said I was aggressive and called me 'darling' - typical bully eh - can't face their actions head on and use every method they can when confronted.  She continued to make my life a misery and I decided to speak to the top man.  When I brought her actions and behaviour to his attention and asked to have a meeting with him and her he said maybe I was unhappy etc.  We agreed I could not continue and the bully got her way and I left the company.

I put this down to experience, but it left me angry.  Seven months later I was walking home with my husband 6 foot 4 inches and heavily built.  I walked passed one of the team - her accomplice a guy who stirred her up and encouraged her.  I confronted him; he was so scared and denied everything at first saying he was not part of the bullying.  I kept firmly demanding to get answers for their bullying - then he showed his own cowardice he blamed her and said 'I was on your side all along'.  I then firmly questioned this and demanded to know why this disgusting behaviour happened in the first place, and he said the bully saw me as a threat to her job and got scared so wanted to make my life a misery and get me out of the company.  I then demanded an apology he kept walking away but I followed him and continued to demand an apology, which he eventually did after much persistence on my part.  I told him he was a coward without his mob and how bullies always deny their actions and are nothing when confronted on even terms.  These people were adults over 30 years old at least, so should have known better.

I hope my story highlights that bullies are always cowards, they always work in mobs and it is always because they are jealous or threatened by you and that is why they behave in such a manner.  It is not always easy to deal with bullies as they are crafty and it is usually done so that the blame lands on the victim.  It is not always easy to go to someone in authority as it can be your word against theirs and when they have mob backing it can create more problems.  But I now have closure as when I confronted this man he looked scared, ashamed and I humiliated him about his cowardice - justice always comes to the victim but it is not always easy and immediate - be strong and in your darkest times remember they are cowards who victimise people who they are jealous of - you have a gift or a talent that is driving them mad with envy.

Trishx xx